Dear Dr. Staff: Is it true that the earth rotates around the north pole every day? If the earth does whirl around so fast, how come we don't fly off?
Dear Rothead: The earth does rotate around its axis, but what keeps people from flying off is based on complex physics principles. Basically, the sun is constantly spewing out lots of tiny things called photons. These little specks hit people and keep them from flying off the earth. They don't have any weight, but there are so many of them that they still can hold you down on the ground. (This is how airplanes work-they often have reflective hulls that keep the photons from holding them down.) It's amazing how complex things can actually be understood by common idiots like yourself when you just have an expert explain them to you. That's my job, though, so no thanks are in order.